A Working Week

I've had a full week of work this week, following on from two days last week. It's my second job through a supply teacher recruiting agency. Technically, I want to work at the preschool level, but for the sake of getting income, I'll take temporary work as a teaching assistant at the primary (elementary) level too.

That's what happened this week, but I wasn't prepared for working one-on-one with a special needs child. It was two days originally, then they asked me back this week. Although I hadn't enjoyed the first two days, I accepted both because I didn't want to turn down a week of work and because I knew it would be good experience. Besides, I've worked with enough children with developmental delays to know how rewarding it is once you build a rapport.

Over the week, in talking to other staff, I realised that I could probably get asked back indefinitely to work here—not with the same child, but in one capacity or another. Eventually, that might even lead to a permanent position. Sure enough, on Friday afternoon, I was asked if I could work for another two weeks, i.e. until half-term.

I turned it down.

Logically, it was the only choice I could make. I want to work at the preschool level, I have applied for a course to do my Early Years Initial Teacher Training next year, but there's no way I'll get work with a nursery if I'm booked up at a primary school. One of the reasons I'm doing supply work is to get experience of local nurseries and build up my own network of contacts.

Beyond that, this week was incredibly draining. It's rough anyway trying to build a relationship with a struggling child, but I'm trained in child-led methods of education, while this school operated on mostly adult-led methods. I was struggling to follow practices that felt counter-intuitive to me. Besides, my brain being what it is, I was thinking about it in the evenings as well: reviewing how things were going and problem-solving for the next day. This meant that life-admin and a lot of kid-stuff got put off (which might explain why there have been two massive fights under our roof this week).

On the other hand, supply work with a nursery is thin on the ground and an entire week's work is never something to be sneezed at, so I've said that I'll be happy to go to the same primary school again after half-term if they still need somebody. If I could do a week or two every month, that would be fantastic.

There's something rather heady about turning work down, and I'm proud of myself for having the confidence to do it. I made the mistake in my early adult life of taking the first available job and making the best of it. Making the best of something that isn't quite what I wanted can always be Plan B. But this time, I'm going for Plan A first.

After finishing work on Friday, I spent 24 hours feeling utterly exhausted. Shout out to my parents who took the kids for me on Friday night, so I could see my boyfriend... and shout out to my boyfriend who made me dinner. I had an evening of decompressing before I had to be a responsible adult again. We tried out an Indonesian recipe and drank some random korean fruit-based alcoholic drinks he'd found at the international store.

This is how we Friday.

For far too much of today, I've been lying on the sofa, cuddling the cats (who have had a much lonelier week than they're used to) and eating the lemon drizzle cake my Mum sent home with the kids. I did perk up in the afternoon, and the goal is to go out and do something, kids and all, tomorrow, but the lesson learned from this week is the mental stamina that working can require. As I figure out the career side of things, I need to be realistic about how much of myself I can give to a job.