De-cluttering

We had some snow this evening, with a chance of more overnight.  It's the first we've had, since the winter's been so mild up until now.  Last weekend, we bought a sled on clearance at Target, thinking that we might be able to use it next year.  With a bit of luck, we might be able to use it tomorrow...  But not too much luck.  I'd rather not be snowed in for the next week!

That said, what I really need is to do some spring cleaning.  If there's one aspect of Montessori that I'm very very bad at, it's the prepared environment.  I do not have tidy habits....  It's something I try to work on, but I'm like a rollercoaster dieter: I'll tidy furiously, and keep up my resolutions for a week or two (usually getting frustrated by how the children will not let me devote all my attention to it), then slack off again, and the house will go back to it's cluttered state.

Of course, I do like the way Montessori emphasises order and tidiness, and part of that is because I want my children to be better at this than I am.  So ever since my son was born, I've made it a priority to keep his space / things clean, clear and organised, and he has indeed been tidier than me since about the age of twelve months.

The problem is that the arrival of my daughter made it that much harder to keep up, and three years on from my son's birth, we have a lot more toys.  I've also got the challenge of keeping my child-friendly environment accessible and stimulating both to a non-walking baby and a three year old. 

For example, we have one of those storage units with multicoloured bins downstairs.  I made sure all the lower racks contained baby-friendly stuff, while the small and/or delicate things were on the top shelf, out of my daughter's sight.  However, while my son is well able to take one of the bins to our living room rug (i.e. the designated play area), my daughter can't carry them yet, so she just sits next to them and pulls everything onto the floor.

These days it's not just my daughter who's doing it.  Ever since Christmas, I've been noticing that my son has been getting less focused in his play and more likely to dump toys on the floor or start throwing them.  He knows perfectly well that if he wants to throw something, he should throw a ball--he'll parrot that rule back at me as soon as I bring the problem up.

The misbehaviour in itself is not what's bothering me (although I don't like it), it's the fact that it's become a rare thing to see him absorbed in his activities, and when I try to encourage him to do something, he's defaulting to a refusal.   Again, not always, but it's unusual for him to be willing to do anything that's my idea.

I do need to account for the fact that nearly all of 2012 so far has been spent with some illness or other working its way through our household.  As a result, I've been more tired, more distracted and more irritable (see also every blogpost this year, save for the first optimistic one!).  That kind of thing is always going to have a negative effect on my children's behaviour.

Nevertheless, his sudden lack of focus is disturbing... At the beginning of the year, I was anxious about how best to capitalise on a recent interest in learning the alphabet.  I needn't have worried, because he hasn't shown any interest in letters for weeks now, but it's not because a new interest has come along to replace it.  He's just not wanting to do anything.  At school, his behaviour and motivation have not changed; it's a home issue.

My daughter's focus has never been as good as her brother's.  It might just be her nature, but I've always wondered if it's because there's a lot more distraction in her environment... the television is more likely to be on, there are more toys, I'm messier than I used to be, etc. etc.  Now I'm worried that this messy environment is having a negative impact on her brother.

Whether I'm right or wrong on that score, I can't allow him to continue making a mess with his toys.  Since my efforts on that line have been failing, I need to reduce the toys.  My plan is to cut right back: Anything with lots of parts is going to get relegated to storage; make sure that there are no more than two things on any shelf, and try and keep the contents of storage bins to a minimum; Eliminate 'lights and noise' toys from the living area.

Step Two will require me to be more diligent about sitting down with the children and enforcing the rules: all toys stay on the rug; return toys / activities / work to their proper place when finished.  I'm generally happy to turn a blind eye to toys left out on the rug, provided they're cleared away by evening, but my daughter's just starting to follow directions, so now's a good time to be firmer about the rules and certainly more consistent!


Short term, I'd like to be able to sit down and work with either child more readily.  Long term, I'd like to bring some of the more complex toys back to the living area, and see them regain their novelty.  But ultimately, I want to see my son regain his attention span, and I'd like my daughter to improve hers.  Fingers crossed that this works.